Friday, February 9, 2018

Extra, Extra!

I have some news!  As I have mentioned in a previous post, I had put in for a transfer at my job to the Adult Day Program and after a couple weeks of waiting, I finally got a call for an interview for tomorrow!  I know that I said I would give my current position more time, but honestly, I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to interview for the position.  I can always decline it and they could always refuse me the position - so my perspective is, what do I have to lose?

I currently work residential between two different houses, although I'm mainly at one house.  I'm responsible for their care and teaching them how to live in their houses and in the community.  I administer medications, cook dinner, wash dishes, give four showers, do laundry, clean the kitchen and the bathrooms and do a bunch of paperwork.  I'm also an advocate to one of the individuals in the residence which means I make sure that she is aware of her rights, help her manage her money and make sure her room stays clean.  On top of all that, I have to give all four ladies my attention almost 24/7.  It doesn't sound like much, but it is.

I have a lot of liability with my job and I'm just not sure that I'm 110% satisfied where I'm working for a few reasons.  The drama has died down quite considerably, but I'm just not sure it's where I want to stay.

Here's to hoping that I get it!  It was funny too because I bought Chinese food yesterday and today opened a few fortune cookies with my lunch and it was just ironic how two of them said, "I will be making a change in job soon" and that "I will be making changes soon" or something to that effect.

If I get this job, more than half of my responsibility is cut in half and I'll have weekends off and all holidays that the state has off (and be paid for them) as well as if there is an inclement of weather, the day program is shut down.  Oh!  And it's first shift! ^^

Another announcement that I want to make is that I will hopefully be starting vlogging soon, so you guys can hear me and see me instead of read my blog!

Anyway, I have to cut this short because my ladies Valentine's Day prom is tonight and I have to get ready to step out the door to help them get ready soon! :)

Have a great Friday, everyone! <3

Tuesday, January 30, 2018

Truth Tuesday

As of late (yesterday), I have been feeling very bogged down by all my emotions and things that I'm feeling lately.  I work, I come home and I keep to myself mostly until my head gets so full that it's ready to explode and I try to unload it all on Jay which may or may not be a fair thing to do - but he doesn't like talking about feely things all the time like I do.  I'm the "feeling expressor" and Jason, well, not so much.  I try not to burden Jason too much with "serious" talks because he never handles it well.  I thought maybe having a weekly or monthly "Truth Tuesday" may help me feel at least a little better to express how I've been feeling all week or all month (I guess whenever I see fit), it would help me not feel so bogged down.  I'm not sure it will be sufficient enough for me, but it's worth a shot, right?

As you all know, Jason and I have been tossing the idea of having a baby in three years or so time.  I figured in three years time would be a sufficient amount of time to do everything we (I) need to do in order to prepare the best we (I) can.  I'm saying "I" because I really feel like I'm a little bit alone in all of this.  I have began to set my whole mindset around having my first child in three years time.  I definitely would like to have my first child right around the age of 30 years old - yes, I know...I'm having children later in life than most women.  Personally, not everyone's cards are laid out exactly the same way.

Sunday, January 28, 2018

A Rainy Sunday

Currently listening to - Let You Down by NF

Today feels like a very lazy, rainy Sunday even though I have to work today.  This post will probably consist of a lot of random ramblings of nothing in particular.  Not much has happened since my last post but my work meeting and work.  I'm just glad that my cold is finally letting up - it was truly awful.  Almost sixty dollars later to find out what works and what doesn't in order to get over this cold.  I started off with purchasing Theraflu (which to be fair, I haven't taken a lot of), Mucinex and Zzzquil.  After almost a whole bottle of Mucinex, I figured out that it wasn't going to break my cold.  The only thing out of that combo that worked good was the Zzzquil to help me sleep, but after talking with a co-worker of mine - she said to pick up some Delsym.  All I can say is, that shit is expensive but totally worth it.  I've been taking Delsym now for about two days and it has started to break up my cold really well. :)

Hopefully in a few more days, I'll be back to new...

I had my work meeting pertaining to the drama that has been going on in the work place.  Surprise, surprise that the root cause of the drama didn't show up to the meeting and the funny part of all this?  She had training class from 9am-12pm in the same building our meeting was in and our meeting was at 12pm.  Go figure.  We all said what needed to be said and we will see what the outcome of the situation is hopefully soon.  I know that I feel pretty good about the meeting and felt it was a pretty productive meeting.

Wednesday, January 24, 2018

Oi - It's Just Been a Stressful Time...

I know I said that I would work on blogging more, but I also don't want to push writing up a post if I'm not in the mood for it either.  It's been a real stressful month or so.  Jason was laid off from his work for about three weeks and has been without a paycheck now for just about a whole month.  We're still waiting for his unemployment checks to come in the mail and it has been super stressful to say the least.  I mean, he is unemployed for the same three weeks each year, but his employer did the unemployment a lot different this year and it screwed us up along with all his co-workers.

Through it all, I had to make an eye doctor appointment because I have difficulty driving at night and driving at night is sometimes apart of my current position.  $234 dollars later and I will be the new owner of some Coach brand eyeglasses that will have Blue IQ and Anti-glare added to them.  However, I'm hoping to be able to successfully transfer out of the position I'm in currently due to an excessive amount of unnecessary drama that has taken place over the course of the past month and a half as well as making the decision overall based on feeling like I might be a better fit for the position in which I'm requesting to transfer to in the way of job duties as well.  I just put in a transfer request today - so here's to hoping that I get it!  #fingerscrossed

Sunday, December 31, 2017


...since I could hold my head up high.  Sorry, I just had to - if anyone knows the band Staind, they will understand.  But seriously, it's been awhile since I've done a post.  I'm hoping in 2018 that I can do a lot more posting.  Things have just been so crazy with work, the holidays and some unnecessary drama that took place along the way.

Jason has been laid off for the past three weeks and goes back to work on the 4th of January.  We were able to manage a small Christmas.  I got some small gifts for Jason's parents and the individuals that I work with, my trainer and my supervisor.  I took Jason up to Greenville for the day the day after Christmas and we walked the park downtown and ate at his favorite Italian restaurant, Bellacinos.  We went over his parent's house for Christmas, opened presents and ate dinner.  I was so exhausted from work that I fell asleep twice.  I slept most of the time actually.

Work has been crazy.  Some of the staff are causing unnecessary drama with a whole bunch of rumors going around about me.  It's really unreal - I really thought that with the nature of the work, that this would be a very professional environment.  I'm getting extremely tired of all the drama because I don't do drama at all.  In fact, I told the supervisor that if the drama keeps up, I'm strongly thinking about putting in a transfer.  It would be a real shame as I love the individual's that I care for and my supervisor, but I'm not going to put up with this bullshit any longer.  It's just getting ridiculous now.

Then we had an individual come back home after a home visit for the holiday with a strand of virus that so far as gotten herself sick, another individual, myself and another staff member.  I've never lost so much waste out of myself in a days time.  It's was truly awful - I filled 4 grocery shopping bags full of vomit and even more than that coming from the back end.  I've lost a total of 12 pounds since 2 a.m Friday morning.  I'm just now trying to build myself back up with eating and it's still going right through me.  I haven't actually ate a solid meal since 10pm on Thursday night.

Then I'm having issues with my dad that I don't even really have the patience to go into honestly.  I'm just tired of wasting my breath, time and energy on him.  I'm tired of wasting my life away being upset and depressed because of him.  No matter what I say to that man (if you can even call him that), he either just doesn't get it or doesn't want to get it.  I really feel like he is in major denial and doesn't want to own up to a single thing he's put me through.  I'm tired of getting my hopes up with him as I've been doing that since my parents got divorced.  At this point, it's a lost hope.  I need to move on with my life.  I'm tired of staying in my feelings and it bogging down my life while everyone else stays content in their own situation.

Jason and I are planning on trying for a baby in three years time and I'm not allowing any leeway for bullshit in my life anymore.  I don't just have myself to think about anymore, but my future child.  Jason and I are going to put away as much money as we possibly can from now all the way until the next three years in preparation of having this baby.  I will do a separate post regarding our plans to have a baby because this post is filled with a lot of negativity and Jason and I's plans to have a baby shouldn't even share the same blog post such as this one that is filled with negativity. 

I'm feeling better at least, but I'm not doing anything until after Wednesday.  I'm using my two days off to sleep and get rest.  I hope you all having a wonderful and safe New Years Eve and Day.  I know I will have a safe one because I will be working... \o/

Saturday, December 9, 2017


It's not even officially winter yet until December 21st and we have already had our first snow fall of the winter.  Personally, I'm not surprised in the slightest as we have had an unusually cold fall.  I had a feeling that we were going to see snow this year.  I mean, over the course of these past two days, it's been enough to just make an appearance and be pretty without all the mess which was nice.  Our cat's have seen many winters, but I wasn't sure if Rebel had seen snow yet, so we took him out this morning for a little bit and this was his reaction...

So as you can tell, he wasn't very impressed and wanted back in the house...haha!

But this was our pretty snow fall...

Pretty enough, but didn't stick which is fine by me.  I'm trying to get into the Christmas mood, but it's just hard for me this year as I'm going through a lot of changes and some of those changes are very difficult.  This was me trying to be festive for my ladies the other night when we took them to a Christmas party...

I tried at least...

This is my ladies Christmas tree and their decorations...

I had class yesterday for two and a half hours and then I had to work from 4pm to 12am, so it was a long day.  My human resource lady came into the class to ask me a question and I had asked her if at some point, she could go into detail with me about how the maternity leave works and such for the future, so I know how I need to prepare in the future and my instructor almost choked on her brownie because she thought I was pregnant.  Nooope, not pregnant yet...

But I have to go into work an hour early tonight because we're taking the girls to a Christmas show up in Greenville for 5:30pm.  I'm kind of nervous to drive the bus on the interstate, but I do have to start getting use to it because my job will require it sometimes.

Other than that, not much going on.  I've just been really tired as of late.

I hope you all have a safe weekend! 

Thursday, December 7, 2017


If anyone has known me from my late teenage life to now then they know how dead set I was on not having children.  I'm going to be completely honest - I had the same fear that I think crosses most women's minds which is the pain you go through during labor.  My opinion of having children was a very shallow one, but none the less, it was an opinion.  Personally, (and it might sound harsh) I thought they were money wasting, time stealing, snot nosed little demonic spawns of Satan.  I know...again, harsh.  I liked the thought of being able to do what I want, when I want.  I like my undisturbed sleep, having my money to myself other than paying bills, my free time, being able to do things and not have to worry about what to do with a child and the list goes on.

Yes, all of my reasons were pretty selfish - I'll be the first one to admit that.  But what's even more selfish is knowing you're not ready to have a child(ren) and do so because you believe that it's what's expected of you by society or that your nagging (but lovely) future mother-in-law wants you to give her grandchildren.  It's your body, your life and no one else's decision but you and your partners.  It's not a decision to make lightly even though a lot of people seem to make that decision like it's nothing and it's becoming more and more common in today's society that little to no decision is actually made when it comes to bringing a baby into this chaotic world.